Letter to Society

Dear Society,

How are you? How have you been? It’s been over a month since I last wrote to you. Yet, you have never left my thoughts. You occupy my mind in ways I cannot ignore. I see people around me—the way a man and a woman behave, the way they exist in relation to one another—and I think of you.

Is it even possible now to separate a man from society? A woman from society? We have become so deeply interwoven that the lines have blurred. Perhaps that is only natural, for when men and women came together, wasn’t it then that you were born? But tell me, when did you take over? When did the individual start dissolving into something dictated by norms, rules, and expectations? When did you decide that a man’s existence should carry more weight than a woman’s? Who set these roles in stone?

Once, we lived in open spaces, governed by nature’s laws. But over time, we built walls. And the more walls we built, the more distance we created among ourselves. From moving in tribes and communes to joint families, to nuclear families, and now—to living in isolation. The foundation upon which you stand is beginning to shake. How long before it collapses entirely? And when it does, will we survive the wreckage?

We are social beings. We need each other to live, to grow, to sustain. That is the nature of our existence. Then why does it feel as if everything around us is falling apart? Why do I not see stability and strength, but rather division and detachment? When did the gap between men and women grow so wide, so deep?

There was a time when we did everything together. Everyone had their role, and each part was essential. I may not be an expert in human history, but I refuse to believe that it was always this broken. And yet, here we are—so divided that we write books saying, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. But tell me, Society, why is it that a man is placed as the supreme lord, the supreme power, when it is a woman who creates, nurtures, and brings life into this world?

And still, women are fewer in number. They outlive men, and yet, they make up only 49% of the world’s population. Sex-selective abortions remain a reality. Cultural norms still prioritize male children—citing inheritance, financial security, religious customs. Gender inequality prevails. Women are trafficked for the pleasure of men, forced into marriages they never chose. Why does this world feel like a machine run solely by men, with women pushed to the margins?

Wasn’t it men and women together who created you? Then why does it feel as if only one of them holds the reins?

There is so much I want to say, but I find myself grasping for words. The weight of these thoughts has been heavy on my heart for years—ever since I began to understand human relationships, both personal and societal. The system you have created baffles me. How did we get here? And more importantly, how do we move forward from here?

Gender roles have existed for as long as history remembers. I understand that biology plays a role, that agriculture shifted the way men and women functioned in society, that property ownership gave way to power structures. But was it always meant to be this way? With men deciding, maneuvering, shaping the world in ways that serve them best?

Patriarchy has stood for centuries, shaping laws, traditions, and entire civilizations. But tell me, Society, how long will you let it remain this way? How long will men continue to hold the power while women are forced into lives they never wished for?

I am waiting for your answer.

Until next time,

Love,

Afrah Futun